There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
