Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Someone signed my nipple.
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