ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
