let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
