Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
