he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
