So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
this just has baby written all over it
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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