she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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