Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
