THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
