i think i have herpe
just one?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize