I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
