i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
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