You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
