He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
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