Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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