His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
