I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
