He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
