I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
