Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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