I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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