DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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