All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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