I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Floor bacon is actually really good
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize