i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
