I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
