Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Randomize
