none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
