I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize