I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
