How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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