I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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