he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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