sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
