party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
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