He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
where are you?
Hypothermia
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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