Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
