The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
