Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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