What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
You know, be my cock's hype man.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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