hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
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