did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize