I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
