I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
