On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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