I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
