Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
