hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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