I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
