Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
